“So boring…” Coffee yawned again, “I wonder if there’s anything good on. Let’s watch TV.” He moved the milk and cat food his human had prepared before leaving to sit in front of the television, then dragged over his own cushion. Coffee stretched out comfortably, pressed the power button on the remote control.

Today was truly destined to be a dull day; there wasn't even anything worth watching on TV. Coffee cycled through every channel several times, finally resigning himself to watching the rerun of the romance drama he and his human had watched just the night before. “That guy is a creep, don’t go with him! Yes, yes, chase him down, hit him, hit him hard.” As he watched, Coffee gestured wildly, completely engrossed in giving advice to the characters. Just as the hero, rushing to rescue the heroine, was about to be stabbed in the back by the cunning villain, Coffee, mid-flailing, was interrupted by the incessant barking of that stupid, clumsy, ill-mannered little Lion Dog from next door. Coffee perked up his ears. He heard footsteps ascending the stairs, pausing in the hallway while the neighbor’s dog never stopped barking. Amidst the canine clamor, the footsteps moved to Coffee’s front door, followed by the sound of a key turning in the lock.

“Who would come at this hour? Those footsteps don’t sound like the human’s,” Coffee muttered to himself, scrambling to turn off the television, put the food and water bowls and his mat back in their places, and then settling on the sofa, feigning the innocent, adorable posture of a cat.

The key jiggled for a moment before the door was pushed open just a crack. A pair of eyes darted into the room, sweeping around a few times, before the door was shoved wider. A figure flashed inside quickly, shutting the door behind him and surveying the scene. The first thing he saw was a pair of eyes burning into him. The man jumped, but relaxed when he looked closer. “Oh, it’s just a cat.”

Coffee tilted his head and let out a soft, inquisitive, “Meow?”

Seeing it was only a cat, the man relaxed and peered around the room. He then began randomly opening drawers, rummaging through the living room for a while, before pushing open the bedroom door.

Coffee followed him around, perplexed, unsure of what this intruder was doing. His human had repeatedly instructed him: “Be polite to guests, let them see that Coffee is a well-bred child.” Because of this, Coffee was always sweet and charming in front of strangers, proud to reflect well on his owner. Seeing the man rummaging through the cabinets look his way, he quickly adopted an endearing posture and chirped sweetly, “Meow.” Sadly, his performance earned no praise as usual; the man didn't even acknowledge him, continuing to search through his human’s cabinets.

“Stupid human who doesn’t appreciate artistry!” Coffee thought resentfully. Usually, guests in this situation would pat his head and say, “Such a cute kitty,” or give him a scratch. Who even was this person? What was he looking for? Full of questions, Coffee hopped onto the ** and lay down, intently watching the man’s every move.

The man went through every drawer, stuffed a pair of the human’s earrings and several necklaces into his pocket, and then turned his attention to the bed, tossing pillows and bedding about wildly. He even waved Coffee off the bed. “Meeow, meow, meow!” Coffee cried out at him in fury. This was his and the human’s bed; who was this person to do this? If the human’s usual teachings hadn’t kept a sliver of reason intact, this annoying guy would have been met with a full set of Cat Fists that morning.

The man searched fruitlessly for a while longer, then cursed bitterly, “Broke bastard! You look decent enough, why don’t you prostitute yourself for some cash! You’re dirt poor, making the big boss here waste a trip!” He spat toward a framed photo on the bed showing the human with Coffee, saying this as he did.

Coffee felt a rush of heat flood to the top of his head. When he regained his senses, he found the man clutching his face in pain, while Coffee crouched opposite him, adopting an attacking stance. Without a doubt, the scratches on that annoying, treacherous, ugly face must have been left by his own ‘delicate paws.’ Ugh, I’ve done it again, Coffee moaned internally. Ever since learning that set of Cat Fists from those Yao, he had been extremely careful, never daring to use them in front of his human. If she saw him using violence to solve a problem, she would be heartbroken; she had always taught him that a lady should never resort to force. Oh heavens, I actually hit someone in my own house! What am I going to do? The human will be furious when she gets back!

As Coffee spun around in distress, the man cursed and kicked out at him. In his extreme agitation, Coffee’s reason once again surrendered to instinct. Before the leg even made contact, he agilely wrapped himself around the man’s leg, scrambling up in a few swift movements, lunging toward the upper body, and sinking his teeth fiercely into the man’s jaw. “Aaaargh…” The man’s scream, along with a string of offensive curses, echoed through the room once more.

Looking at the claw marks and bite marks on the man’s face, Coffee hardened his resolve: since he’d already struck, he might as well finish it—silence the witness, destroy the evidence, anything to keep the human from seeing it. His eyes glinted menacingly as he stepped toward the man, who had drawn a dagger and was advancing on him.

Man and cat stood facing each other in the room, eyes locked, feet shuffling slowly as they circled, neither breaking gaze, not missing the slightest flicker of expression in the other’s eyes. Amidst their tense, shallow breaths, Coffee couldn't hold back and leaped up, roaring, “Meow! (Translation: Cat Claw! — First Form of Coffee’s Cat Fists)” The man simultaneously lunged with the knife, but Coffee’s movement was far swifter. Before the dagger could connect, he raked the man’s hand heavily and then deftly sprang aside.

The man was momentarily stunned by the sheer speed of a cat’s movement. Coffee gave him no time to recover. The instant his paws touched the ground, he sprang up again, yelling, “Meow-meow-woo! (Translation: Cat Bite — Second Form of Coffee’s Cat Fists)” He opened his mouth, aiming directly for the man’s throat. Since he had resolved to destroy the evidence, he needed to turn the target into a corpse first. Coffee deployed only his most ruthless maneuvers. But this time, the man’s hand sped up, the dagger thrusting toward Coffee. Realizing he was about to impale himself on the blade, Coffee thought quickly, extended his claws to snag the man’s other arm, and swung sideways like a pendulum, narrowly evading the strike. His motion was relentless; he immediately flipped over, shouting, “Woo-meow-woo! (Translation: Cat Leg Kick — Third Form of Coffee’s Cat Fists)” and drove his hind legs hard toward the man’s face. The man raised a hand to block in panic, right into the path of the kick aimed at the hand holding the dagger. With a clang, the knife fell to the floor.

With the weapon gone, the highly skilled Coffee had nothing more to fear and unleashed his full repertoire of moves upon the man. Under Coffee’s storm-like assault, the man, who had initially been shouting and wildly throwing objects, soon collapsed onto the floor, groaning amidst his many wounds.

“Phew, finally done,” Coffee sighed, stretching his limbs long. He hadn’t been out of the house much lately; it had been so long since he’d had such a satisfying workout. It felt great. But when he noticed his surroundings, he froze: the house was a disaster zone. Since the man had searched nearly every drawer, half the contents were now strewn about or piled on the floor. On top of that, the recent fierce battle between man and cat had trampled everything into a mess. Furthermore, the man had grabbed various objects around the room in a desperate attempt to fight back, so the vases, clocks, and trinkets that once adorned the tables were now shattered beyond recognition on the floor, their shards of glass glinting serenely across the floorboards…

“Waaa… meow-meow-meow…” Coffee shrieked loudly, “What am I going to do!” No, no matter what, this had to be resolved before the human returned!

Things from the drawers? Stuff them back! Broken trinkets? Quickly glue them with superglue! Glass shards? Sweep them under the bed… Coffee bustled around the room, tidying some things, hiding others, until, in his eyes, everything was mostly back in order. Only then did he breathe a sigh of relief and return to the man, pondering how to dispose of this biggest piece of garbage.

The man had woken up a few times while Coffee was busy, but Coffee quickly discovered him each time and knocked him out again with a flurry of claws and teeth. Only the culprit remained. He dared to invade my home and make the human angry at me—hmpf… Coffee placed all the blame on the intruder, circling the ‘massive’ body, trying to figure out how to get rid of something so large without leaving a trace. Should he flush him down the toilet like that little fish he accidentally killed last time? But this guy was too big; he wouldn't fit in the toilet bowl. Should he stuff him in the bottom of the trash bag like the broken vase, hoping the human would unknowingly toss it out? But this man was so tall, weighing as much as a pig; the human surely couldn’t lift him? Coffee cycled through countless ideas, reviewing every trick he’d ever used to cover up his mistakes, but none applied to the current situation. What now? Coffee frantically washed his face with his paws. No matter what, he had to get rid of him before the human got home, otherwise she would see him, and all his other “good deeds” would be exposed too! What to do? What to do? Coffee pulled at his fur, spinning in circles, his gaze landing on the window. Right! A brilliant idea struck him: toss him out the window, that would solve it! Just yesterday, he’d heard the neighbor saying that a car parked downstairs had been smashed by something thrown from an upper floor, and since there were so many residents upstairs, no one could figure out which apartment it came from. Exactly! Throw him out the window—who could prove it came from our place?

Having made up his mind, Coffee first opened the window, then strained, rolling the man toward the window base. The biggest problem now was how to get this man up onto the windowsill. Coffee suddenly understood what his human meant about “people generating several times their usual strength in desperate situations.” Even a small cat like him, when panicked, could manage to drag a person onto a chair, and then from the chair onto the table beneath the window.

After exerting Herculean effort, they were finally there—nearly high enough for the windowsill. Coffee gasped for breath, leaning down to rest, thinking that the next step was simply to push him out, and everything would be fine. The human wouldn't know about his bad behavior and wouldn't be angry with him.

The man was “lucky” enough to wake up precisely at the moment Coffee was about to push him out the window. Realizing his location, he let out a heart-wrenching scream. He saw the sheer drop of dozens of meters below; half his body was already dangling out the window, threatening to plummet at any moment and smash his skull. He screamed loudly, his hands gripping the window sash desperately.

Why was he awake again? That last beating must have been too light. Coffee swiped at his head and then shoved hard toward the outside. Only then did the man understand that this cat intended to push him out the window. “Help! Help me!” The man completely forgot about maintaining his dignity and yelled for aid. But at this hour, few people passed by, and he had specifically chosen this building in the least-trafficked part of the complex. So, though he screamed until his voice cracked, no one came to his rescue. Under the relentless application of Coffee’s claws and teeth, he was pushed out inch by inch, finally left hanging outside the window by his hands, screaming hysterically, life hanging by a thread. Meanwhile, Coffee circled, biting at his fingers, trying to make him let go and fall. If Coffee hadn't worried about standing too far out and being pulled down with him, the man would have been gone already.

“Meow, meow (Go down, go down).” Seeing that the man was enduring the pain and refusing to let go, Coffee changed tactics, sweeping his tail across the man’s face. This tickling, fuzzy sensation was worse than being bitten. The man sneezed several times, and the danger of falling grew more severe.

“Meow?” Coffee suddenly perked up his ears. There were footsteps in the hallway again, and these sounded incredibly familiar. Could it be…? The sound of keys jingling at the door, followed by the lock turning. Then, the crisp tap-tap of high heels on the floor.

The human… the human was home? The human usually left in the morning and didn’t return until she got off work in the evening. Why was she back so early, near noon? Usually, the human returning early was the thing Coffee looked forward to most, but today, how he wished his human wouldn't come back yet!

“Help me, please help!” Hearing someone enter, the man screamed at the top of his lungs. The cries for help alerted Coffee’s human, who rushed into the room. Seeing the scene, she shrieked loudly.

It’s over… Coffee drooped his head dejectedly. Just one more step, just one more push, and that guy would have been gone! Now the human had discovered everything. Wuwu, it’s all over. The human will be furious, absolutely furious…

Coffee’s human darted to the bedside phone and dialed. “110? I need to report a crime; there’s a burglar in my house! Hurry over! He’s hanging out the window and about to fall! What? You want me to pull him up first? I’m just a woman; what if he attacks me if I pull him up? Hurry, or he really will fall!”

Minutes later, sirens wailed, and several officers rushed upstairs. They first hauled the exhausted man clinging to the outside of the window back inside, then asked Coffee’s human a few questions before escorting the handcuffed man away. The human nervously checked the house, and the broken vase Coffee had hidden, the glued-together cups, and similar items were naturally discovered.

Since the moment Coffee saw his human return, he had been in a state of shock, paying no attention to his surroundings. Now, watching the various items appear in his human’s hands, he muttered to himself, “The human is angry, the human found out! What should I do? What should I do?” Hearing his human sigh occasionally or angrily exclaim, “Damn it, this makes me so mad! He actually broke my vase, I demand he apologize with his life!” Coffee felt even more afraid to emerge from under the table, thinking how truly angry she was. After a long time, hearing the sounds inside cease, Coffee slowly poked his head out from under the table to look. He saw his human sitting on the sofa, head bowed, looking heartbroken.

Human, are you that angry? Coffee carefully crept to his human’s feet, gently rubbing his head against her ankle, then lifting up to lick her hand: “Meow, meow… (Human, don’t be angry, I know I was wrong, you can hit me)…”

“Coffee…” The human brightened up as she picked him up, “Look, I almost forgot something important.” She tapped her head. The human held Coffee close, examining him repeatedly: “Let me see how pretty Coffee is. Hmm, let’s spray a little perfume. Where is Coffee’s bow? Let me put it on for you… There!” The human tidied Coffee up, picked up a carrier, and put him inside. Coffee struggled fiercely, not wanting to be caged, but he was placed inside anyway. The human then draped a cloth over the carrier, obscuring Coffee’s view of the outside, and carried him out the door.

Coffee thrashed wildly in the carrier, meowing mournfully, but the human refused to release him. The human sometimes took Coffee out for fun, but she never locked him in a carrier. What was wrong today? Was she so angry that she planned to put him in a cage and throw him away? Coffee suddenly slumped down, tears flowing uncontrollably: “Wuwu, the human doesn’t want me anymore…”

Coffee kept struggling the entire trip. By the time the human stopped the car and took him out, the pristine state she had arranged him in before leaving was completely ruined. The human quickly took out her small comb to groom his fur, straighten his bow, and spritz a bit more perfume. After fussing over him for a while, she carried Coffee toward the building ahead, instructing him, “Coffee, you must keep your eyes wide open later, don't be fooled by any playboys. You absolutely must find the most handsome, most outstanding boyfriend!”

Is the human going on a date with a boyfriend? Coffee thought fuzzily, dizzy from the strong perfume.

The human carried Coffee into the building. What reached Coffee’s ears, besides human voices, was a medley of various cat sounds. “Meow?” Coffee, who had been tucked into his human’s arms, poked his head out, looking around curiously. After looking everywhere, he finally understood: he was in a cat café. There were many men and women around, and the most striking thing was that everyone carried a cat. The plump woman nearest to them held a white, long-haired cat with two different colored eyes—the most common type, making up about half the cats present. There were also two black cats that looked exactly like that Yao, Black Ice, and one nearly hairless cat, and others with short fur, like a carpet… Coffee looked around, dazzled by the sight.

“Hello,” the human greeted, sitting down at the nearest table. “This is my Coffee; she’s a girl. Is your darling a boy?”

Coffee had been busy scrutinizing the plump woman, trying to guess how heavy she was and why the chair, which looked rather delicate, hadn't broken under her weight. As he pondered, he felt a gaze fixed on him. He turned his head and saw a pure white Persian cat, looking at him with one big green eye and one big blue eye. How dare someone look at a lady like that? That was the look of a lecherous brute!

“Meow?” Coffee protested with a loud cry and immediately jumped into his human’s lap to hide.

“Weren’t we supposed to only have purebred cats here? Why bring such a mixed-breed alley cat!” A sharp voice drifted down from above. Coffee traced the hands stroking the white cat upward until he saw a mouth opening and closing, revealing red lips and white teeth, still chattering: “My baby is a famous purebred! How could such a mongrel match him? I absolutely will not allow my baby to have kittens with this cat!” The plump woman said, her face showing clear displeasure, babbling incessantly. But the cat in her arms seemed very interested in Coffee, struggling hard to move closer to him.

“Meow-meow-meow… (What do you want?)” Coffee hissed a warning at it.

“Baby, don’t associate with that mutt,” the plump woman commanded her cat.

“How dare you talk about my Coffee like that,” the human said, displeased. “Even though he’s not a purebred, he’s so beautiful, cute, and well-behaved. Look, your baby really likes him too.”

“My baby would be interested in that? Such typical arrogance from the lower class,” the plump woman spat out between clenched teeth.

Hearing the woman’s words, Coffee’s human huffed, hugged Coffee tightly, and moved to another table. The young woman there had a black-furred, white-pawed cat that looked exactly like Black Ice. Out of curiosity, Coffee wriggled free from his human’s hand and leaped onto the table to examine the cat closely. It really looked identical, almost as if they were poured from the same mold. If it hadn't lacked Black Ice’s sharp intelligence (which was actually because a normal cat lacked Black Ice’s Yao energy and the wisdom that surpassed animal intellect), Coffee might have mistaken it for him.

"Hey, are you Black Ice's brother?" Coffee asked, moving closer, "You're a yao too, right?" It sniffed the cat in the woman's arms, detecting no demonic energy whatsoever.

"What are you doing!" the woman cried out, swatting Coffee to the ground. She pulled her cat protectively into her embrace and shouted, "You mongrel cat dare to seduce my prince! Go away, go away, you are unworthy to be our prince's bride."

Coffee, unwilling to suffer such an insult, immediately sprang back onto the table and lunged a claw at the woman. The owner, intimately familiar with its temperament, quickly blocked the attack, preventing any injury. Without waiting for the woman's anger to fully ignite, the owner scooped up Coffee and fled from that old table. Coffee, however, continued to snarl fiercely at the woman.

Following its owner through the gathering, Coffee gradually began to understand that the owner wasn't abandoning it, but rather introducing it to potential boyfriends. Although it had no desire for a boyfriend, realizing it had escaped the fate of being left behind made it regress into its old, mischievous self. At every table the owner carried it to, it antagonized the resident cats. Their owners, whether because Coffee wasn't a "pedigreed breed" or because it bullied their own pets, would drive it away within minutes.

The owner held Coffee, observing how several other cats had already found partners and were cuddling sweetly together, which made her heart grow anxious. Coffee was beautiful, intelligent, charming, obedient... superior to most of the cats here, so why wasn't a suitable match appearing? They had "spoken" with almost every male cat present, and the reaction of most—shrinking into a ball or hiding as soon as Coffee approached—led the owner to furiously deem them cats utterly lacking in aesthetic appreciation, to treat the feline beauty that was Coffee with such disdain. The few brave male cats (brave mainly because they were too dull-witted to notice the yao aura radiating off Coffee, blinded by its appearance) showed great interest, but their owners forbade them from associating with such a mongrel, always chasing Coffee off.

I refuse to believe that a cat as beautiful and graceful as Coffee has no suitable match. The owner persisted, inquiring with the owners of every unattached cat whether their pet was a male.

"Can you stop carrying that mongrel cat around?" a cat owner, unable to tolerate it any longer, finally spoke up.

With him leading the charge, others chimed in, "Exactly, not only is your cat a mongrel, but it's ugly and rude, no cat will want it. Take it and leave."

"Yes, before it corrupts our darlings."

"For a cat like that to even be here, tsk, tsk..."

"Indeed..."

"How could you say such things! My Coffee, though not a purebred, is so beautiful, so smart, can't you see it? How can you speak of her like this!" Coffee's owner retorted loudly to the accusations.

"This is a matchmaking event exclusively for purebred cats, designed precisely so our babies don't mix with low-class cats like that. Doesn't your cat have a pedigree certificate? Then it has no right to be at this gathering. How did you even sneak in?"

"Like owner, like cat. Want to squeeze into our circle? Go back and change your cat first."

"Exactly. Cats are just ignorant; the fault lies with bad people."

"Let her show her invitation! She wasn't invited, was she?"

"The doorman is useless, letting anyone in..."

"Someone bringing a stray mutt thinks they can join our circle. How ignorant."

"..."

Are you criticizing me? Coffee let out growls toward them, but its owner held its body tighter. After a moment of quiet, seeing that the people had stopped talking, Coffee, with a lingering sense of victory, let out a few more barks at the other cats, only to suddenly feel a few drops of warm ** liquid land on its head.

Coffee quickly looked up, astonished to find its owner sniffing miserably, fat tears rolling down her cheeks. "Meow," Coffee jumped up, nudging its owner with its head and licking its owner's hand, trying desperately to comfort her. "Coffee..." The owner pulled it close again, "You are so understanding, so beautiful, so smart, so well-behaved, so sweet... why can't they see that you are clearly the best cat in the world? Why do they look down on you! I am so indignant! Waaaaah..."

"Master..." Coffee rested its head against its owner's neck, feeling its own eyes grow damp. The owner was bullied by those foolish cats and their owners because of it—no, it was those cats and humans who were wrong to dare bully the owner. I must have revenge! I will show them the might of a cat!

"Stop pretending to be pitiful here, just take your trash cat and leave." Seeing the woman cry, many cat owners fell silent, after all, ganging up on one woman wasn't glorious. But some remained insistent.

"They dare bully the Master!" Coffee exploded in fury, leaping from its owner's embrace, crouching low toward the people and cats, issuing threatening hisses from its throat.

"Look at that cat, so ill-mannered, just like its owner! Ah..." Coffee launched itself forward and clawed the woman who spoke. With a shriek, her speech ceased. Then Coffee turned and bit her cat, sending it tumbling and scrambling under a table. "Meow meow meow-woooooo... (Dare to make the Master cry? Watch me teach you a lesson!)" After issuing a challenge to everyone in the room, human and feline alike, Coffee charged toward them.

Amidst human shouts and cat cries, the entire hall descended into chaos. Coffee flew and tumbled between people and cats, darting left and right, unleashing a torrent of Cat Fist. Under its claws and fangs, neither humans nor cats could offer resistance; all were scratched and bitten. Tables overturned, chairs crashed, cups and plates flew, mingled with cries of pain and calls for help. Many fled, clutching their beloved pets.

Coffee's owner watched the spectacle, dumbfounded. When she snapped back to reality, she frantically shouted, "Coffee, come back! Come back now!" Coffee kicked away a blocking cat, bit a man preparing to swing a stool at it until his finger bled, and then swiftly darted back to its owner, rubbing against her hand as if presenting a trophy: "Meow meow meow, meow... (Master, I defeated them all, praise me quickly!)"

"Coffee! You bad child!" the owner roared in anger, grabbing Coffee and fleeing before the injured people could surround them, leaving behind a scene of groaning humans and cats...

"Coffee, because you did such a bad thing, you get no dinner tonight! No milk either! And you're not allowed on the bed!" After escaping home, the owner held Coffee on her lap and spanked its rear end more than a dozen times before tossing it onto the sofa, tapping its nose as she announced the punishment.

"Meow meow meow (I did no wrong, I was helping Master)!"

"Don't talk back," the owner said sternly.

She had specifically taken the day off to accompany Coffee to the matchmaking event, only for it to end like this, which made her furious. What if Coffee was captured as a mad cat for biting so many people? What if the injured parties sued them? But Coffee was amazing; all those people and cats combined couldn't match it—it was simply... The owner suddenly caught herself, quickly suppressing the smile that had appeared on her face, giving the approaching Coffee a fierce glare before stomping back into the bedroom and slamming the door shut. Coffee flung itself against the door, scratching and crying mournfully: "Meow-woooooo... (Master, I won't dare again, don't leave me outside.)"

Ever since the day it was picked up by its owner, Coffee had slept in the owner's bed every night, nestled against her arm. Although it couldn't recall its earliest moments, the biting cold of the outside world was deeply etched into its subconscious. If it slept alone at night, it felt the illusion of abandonment. It refused to sleep in the living room; it needed to be in the owner's bedroom, curled up in her embrace... Wailing, Master won't abandon me... Coffee clawed furiously at the door. If it hadn't remembered Lin Rui's warning—If the Master discovers you have yao magic, she will throw you away—it would have used its power to open the door and rush in.

The door suddenly opened, and the owner appeared in the doorway.

Master has forgiven me! Coffee jumped up excitedly to greet her. But the owner ignored it, walking toward the persistently ringing phone. Coffee seized the opportunity to slip into the room and burrow under the comforter, purring contentedly. The bed was comfortable after all; it wasn't leaving, no matter what.

Eavesdropping with its ears stretched, Coffee heard its owner answering the phone: "Yes, I am the one who called the police this noon... A serial burglar... Really? My cat did that to him? Is that true?... No, no, Coffee is definitely a cat, certainly not a tiger or a leopard. You can certainly have the zoo inspect him... Is that so?... Don't worry, my Coffee gets all its vaccinations on time every year... Alright, I understand. I will be there punctually tomorrow... Yes, thank you, Officer. Goodbye."

Coffee under the duvet stiffened, realizing with a start: the morning's events had come to light. What now? The owner was already angry, and with this, she would surely banish it to the living room.

The sound of the owner walking closer grew louder. Coffee trembled nervously, feeling the blanket on its head suddenly yanked away. It quickly squeezed its eyes shut, waiting for its owner's fury.

"Coffee... you are truly magnificent!" the owner shouted excitedly, scooping Coffee up and lifting it high. "Coffee, thank goodness you were home, the thief didn't succeed. The police just called; he confessed everything. He said you bit him while he was robbing our house, right? Coffee is so amazing! Even the thief kept shouting that you were an enchanted cat yao!"

"Meow meow meow! (What cat yao! Who is the cat yao!)"

"Coffee is the smartest, strongest, and cutest cat in the whole world, I love Coffee the most!" Saying this, she kissed Coffee forcefully a few times, completely forgetting all the anger they had shared.

"Meow meow meow... (Of course, I am the best cat in the world, that goes without saying.)"

"My Coffee defeated a thief! I must tell all my friends that Coffee is the best cat in the world. Hmph, those purebred cats weren't good enough for you anyway." The owner announced, beginning to call friends everywhere to share the news. Coffee climbed onto her lap and curled into a fluffy ball. Having fought two battles today, it was a little tired. Under its owner's intermittent strokes, Coffee slowly drifted off to sleep...