In the second year of Emperor Shun’s reign, Patriarch Zhang Ling received the Divine Talisman of the Supreme Old Lord and the Heavenly Master Sword.

He journeyed to Mount Longhu in Jiangxi for solitary cultivation.

Upon breaking through his seclusion, he subdued the Eight Divisions of Evil Spirits and annihilated the Six Earthly Demon Kings.

Afterward, he traveled with his disciples across various lands, vanquishing monstrous iniquities and benefiting the people of Shu.

Thus was founded the ‘Way of the Heavenly Master,’ which has been passed down to this day.

------ Daozang The sky darkened, the wind picked up, branches twisted, and leaves began to drift down.

Finally, the raindrops started to fall.

This rain wasn't heavy; it tapped with a monotonous rhythm, resembling mist more than a downpour, sealing the bustling world within a net as dense as beaded silk.

Looking into the distance, the streets, buildings, and pedestrians were reduced to mere blurred outlines.

As the saying goes, timely rain is a blessing in spring, arriving exactly when needed.

But at this moment, one man was decidedly displeased.

He was currently slouched near the entrance of his shop, squatting like a toad in a well.

One hand held a cigarette he’d taken a few puffs from, while the other was contorted in a bizarre manner, muttering incantations as if divining some profound cosmic truth.

A closer look revealed that the man was reasonably presentable: a sharp jawline, thick eyebrows framing large eyes, and a high nose bridge.

He wasn't extraordinary, nor ridiculously handsome—just perfectly balanced, aesthetically pleasing, and smooth to look at.

His name was Liu Dashao, the proprietor of this Feng Shui parlor—what folks commonly dubbed a charlatan.

While his business wasn't booming, it usually provided enough for him to keep drinking and smoking, and if his wallet was flush, he could afford a decent meal out.

During his idle hours, he would pore over "textbooks" like Zi Wei Suan Shu and Yun Ji Qi Qian.

Though he was a charlatan, and nine out of ten words he spoke were lies, he still felt he couldn't entirely cheat the public.

He needed to maintain professional dedication, to contribute his small bit to the modernization of socialism! Right? Therefore, the basic homework had to be done.

As for how much he truly understood, well, that depended on his own comprehension.

As the saying went: a forcibly twisted melon won't taste sweet! “The ancient mirror grows dim for many years; one day polished bright, it shines like the full moon.

When a gentleman plots his course by this hexagram, fortune turns naturally with joyous speed.” The divination with his five fingers finally concluded.

Liu Dashao stared blankly for a long moment before grudgingly letting out the resulting verse, perfectly rhymed and structured, giving the impression he actually possessed some insight.

But the line immediately following betrayed his true feelings: “You damned brat! In this cold weather, a little rain is fine! No one blames you for shifting the current of fate.

But why can't you just stop this endless drizzle day after day! You’ve washed away all the good Feng Shui energy I’ve finally managed to accumulate!” Having spoken, Liu Dashao straightened up, aimed a very explicit middle finger at the heavily clouded sky, and cursed with the frustration of a disappointed mentor.

Alas! The drizzle fell with a sound like tiny silver bells.

While pleasant to the ear, it confirmed Liu Dashao’s fears: his already sluggish business had slowed even further.

Normally, people trickled in to have names chosen for their babies, seek blessings for grand openings, or request help with marriages or divorces.

Damn it, it had been a week, and he hadn't seen hide nor hair of anyone! Naturally, our Mr.

Liu blamed this entire streak of bad luck squarely on the incessant rain.

Life was frustrating! When you were down on your luck, even drinking cold water could make you choke, and urinating could give you a shock! Liu Dashao grumbled, the cigarette dangling from his lips, squinting at his watch—it was past three.

Fine.

After mooching around a little longer, he’d close up shop and go to sleep.

If no one showed, he certainly wasn't going to wait on them! Just as he was debating whether to have Master Kong's Spicy Beef Noodle Soup or Uni-President Fu Man Duo for his lonely dinner, the phone on the table suddenly rang out in the stillness.

Liu Dashao’s hand, pinching the cigarette, jerked, scattering ash all over his pants, nearly dropping into his crotch.

“Good thing I zipped up my fly.” Flicking the ash away, Liu Dashao cursed under his breath before gruffly answering the call, “Who is this?” “Is this the immortal Liu?” “Yeah, who’s asking?” “I want to hire you to look at my Feng Shui, for my house.” “Oh! Hello, hello.” He instantly extinguished the cigarette, exhaled the last puff, and switched personas, adopting the most standard, polished tone of a telecom customer service agent.

“Are you looking for a consultation for the entire residence, or just a single room?” “The whole house.

My health has been terrible lately, the whole family is sick.

Yesterday, a friend recommended your services, said you were quite effective.

So, Master, when are you free to take a look?” “Please wait a moment, let me check…” Liu Dashao replied.

Truthfully, what was there to check? He hadn't had an appointment; he was just putting on a show.

It was a fundamental rule of the charlatan trade: make people think you’re busy so they don't assume you have no customers.

A few well-placed vague remarks, and the client would surely believe he was a true master.

Then, not only could he score a good meal and drinks, but the fee would also be negotiable.

“How about this: can you manage the day after tomorrow afternoon? Please give me your address.” “The day after tomorrow…” The man on the other end of the line deflated instantly, like a balloon pricked by an awl.

After a stunned silence, he stammered out a plea, “If I add extra money, Master, could you possibly come tomorrow morning?” Well, well, a bite! Liu Dashao secretly exulted.

His face, adorned with small, gold-rimmed glasses, immediately flushed with excitement.

Even his breathing grew heavy due to the surge of adrenaline.

Of course, excitement aside, he still had to maintain his facade.

“I see…” He rolled his tongue around his mouth, drawing out the vowel, and deliberately rustled the magazine loudly near the receiver to signal that his schedule was packed.

Ten seconds later, Liu Dashao deliberately adopted a look of difficulty.

“Ah! Sir, I can see you are anxious.

Our Taoist teachings emphasize saving the world and helping humanity, accumulating virtuous karma.

Besides, time is like a wo—” At this point, Liu Dashao’s words caught in his throat.

He coughed dismissively, forcing the rest of his prepared speech back down.

He had been about to say: Time is like a woman’s cleavage—if you squeeze it, you can make more.

Fortunately, he caught himself just in time.

While the analogy was vivid and perfect, uttering it would have instantly ruined the respectable image he had so carefully cultivated.

Thinking of this, he couldn't help biting his tongue.

Damn it, that line had come out too naturally! “Master, what was time like?” The man seemed unconcerned about the abrupt stop, only growing more anxious that the Immortal Liu’s schedule seemed so completely full that rearranging it would be difficult.

His voice held an added note of desperation.

“Heh heh!” Liu Dashao laughed and changed tack.

“If we squeeze things a bit, I can spare some time tomorrow after eleven in the morning.

But regarding the fee…” Perhaps it was because he hadn't gotten a good score in ages, or maybe Liu Dashao was simply born greedy, but his tone noticeably sharpened when he uttered the words 'fee.' While not exactly ringing like a bell, it was undeniably clear and precise! (Note: According to his father’s recollection, when Liu Dashao was just old enough to nurse, the first thing he did upon opening his eyes was ignore his father and mother.

He glared like a coyote pup, straining to grab the New Year’s money placed on the kang.

The moment he secured the money, he smiled.

But his usually meek Second Uncle objected, claiming the money was dirty and might carry germs.

Out of concern, the uncle tried to pry the money from Liu Dashao’s grip.

This attempt backfired spectacularly; Liu Dashao immediately burst into tears, crying so loud the sky seemed to darken and the sun and moon were eclipsed.

Coincidentally, his grandfather entered at that moment to greet his grandchild.

Seeing his only beloved grandson in such distress, the old man thought his second son had no business fighting with the child.

He immediately bristled, grabbed his walking stick, and prepared to bring it down on his second son’s head.

Only after the grandmother pleaded fervently was he persuaded to stop.

Terrified, the Second Uncle hastily fumbled in his pockets, added two yuan notes on top of the original red envelope, and only then did Liu Dashao cease his wailing and manage a smile.) “Money is not an issue, as long as you can come tomorrow, money is not an issue,” the voice on the other end promised meekly.

“All right then.

Give me the address.

I’ll be there precisely at eight tomorrow.” OK, objective achieved.

“West Hutong Street, Garden Complex, Building One, Fifth Floor, Unit 404.” “Got it.

See you tomorrow.

Goodbye!” His pen swiftly scribbled the address onto the back of the magazine.

Liu Dashao stretched languidly and let out a comfortable, resonant fart in the boss’s chair.

Don't call him despicable.

In this day and age, sheer honesty wouldn't get you by.

When Liu Dashao first arrived in this city, he didn't understand the rules.

He worked under the scorching noon sun, relentlessly pasting up small advertisements without a break, until he reached the entrance of the police station.

Just then, the officers stepped out for lunch.

Seeing him drenched in sweat, applying glue, and attempting to stick a flyer advertising a cure for ‘unspeakable ailments’ onto the outer wall, the officers laughed heartily and gathered to watch.

Afterward, they gave Mr.

Liu a stern lecture and profound education, confiscating all his tools of the trade.

Total losses amounted to sixteen yuan and thirty-five fen.

That incident deeply shook Liu Dashao’s gentle soul.

He finally understood that effort alone did not guarantee success.

Reflecting on his past life, he realized that being too straightforward was precisely why he had become an aging, unmarried burden on society.

Now that a fat sheep had delivered itself to his doorstep, how could he possibly let it go? Damn it, what a great business opportunity! The physiognomy said: water brings wealth! He knew it! With rain every day, a big job had to be coming.

Liu Dashao squinted his small eyes, looking like a wealthy landlord from the old days gazing at the misty drizzle outside.

His face cracked into a wide, blossoming smile.

He took a deep breath—this time, it was just air—and picked up the address from the desk, scrutinizing it closely.

Heh heh, Market Garden.

That plot was prime real estate in their city center! Prices per square meter were quoted in the tens of thousands.

Thinking of this, his sly little thoughts started bubbling up uncontrollably in his throat, calculating just how much money he could squeeze out of this fellow if the client turned out to be a complete greenhorn.